life at its bestworst

So. Let's wrap things up a little. 2017 was hard. Much better than 2016, but still hard. I've had a stressful last, err, half a year and I'm glad it's over. But let's focus on the goood stuff here, shall we?
I've become a camp counselor and I loved it! My first two shifts were very complicated, but I enjoyed them nonetheless. And I've met SO many people this year, it's crazy.
I've entered my second year at university and this semester was difficult. But I still love studying and that's what's important.
I finally have my own flat! This is insane, I still cannot believe it sometimes. And since I do, I have my beautiful big bookshelves now! That's the real joy of life.
I also adopted a cat from a shelter. Her name is Gloria and she likes to bite, but she also likes to kiss and is generally very smart and pretty. I love her.
I've realized how important it is to be a feminist in this world and I'm proud to be one!
Some of my friendships have blossomed and matured and I appreciate it so much. AND I gained some new friends!
I went to see a musical I was dying to see! Onegin's Demon. Gods, it was absolutely amazing and I definitely wanna see it again. As well as the other musicals those guys have.
I also went to a concert this year. LSP. Didn't realize I could actually enjoy such music, I guess I was wrong. Cause I enjoyed the concert a lot.
New album by Taylor Swift was so amazing I feel like mentioning it here.

See? I've had a great year even with all the stress and sleepless nights and anxiety. I hope next one is gonna be even better.
Hello, 2018! I'm ready for it!

feel broken
So, I'm back with my god-awful mood. Yup. It's sticking. I thought it'd go away, but it's here to stay.
I don't know if it's just autumn depression or something worse. Good things happen to me one after another and I don't feel them. Only realize them with my mind.
It's been almost two months and I still feel bad, the pills that usually tone down my anxiety didn't help and I don't know what to do.
Books help a little bit, but not for long, only while I'm reading and maybe right after…
I hope it passes soon. I can't go on like that. It's exhausting.
Gods, I love literature!

I've had good moments in 2016, but that year was so very hard on me emotionally that, unfortunately, it almost covered all the good I've had. But! Let's try and focus on the bright side for once:
I've had working experience in a book store and I loved it!
I've met Ruslan Usachev, quite a popular YouTuber, while working there.
And some very good people I still keep in touch with.
I got a pet. Degu named Splinter.
I passed exams on my own, again.
Entered the university I've dreamed of for quite some time and now majoring in philology, yas!
I've met a new friend there, Chris, and this woman makes me feel better in a lot of ways.
I also have a fantastic group there, excluding maybe a couple of people. But screw them.
I tried real Korean food (or as close to it as possible) and loved it!
Bought fairy lights I've wanted for a while and pinned them on my wall. Looks beautiful.
Got to see a few really good movies like Fantastic Beasts and Moana.
And, finally, I came home for the first time in a year!
See? I've had my moments. And I hope that 2017 will be full of those beautiful, memorable moments. Mostly I hope I'll regain my mental health and will smile more than cry.

am I too much of a grown up now? naaaah
Okay, where the hell is my Christmas mood? What the fuck, life?
you'll rise again
Soon snow will cover everything.
And by the time next spring comes, I'll be completely fine.

Fleur - Кто-то.
По моим песням можно предсказать мою судьбу. А также рассказать о прошлом и настоящем. Никаких гадалок не надо.
Это так глупо, но сколько слушаю треки, не только этот, столько себя отождествляю.
Ощущение, что подбирая все эти песни много лет назад или недавно, я знаю, что произойдет в моей жизни.

they say crazy is popular; well, fuck
This year (from last September to current one) was the craziest year of my life. It was the happiest and the most miserable of all. I'm grateful for it and I want it gone from my life.
This year was complicated. I loved it. And I hated it.
But I guess, no matter what I say or feel, I don't really regret having it. It taught me quite a lot.
I'm accepting it. And moving on.